Winter Blues…in April 

Yay, it’s Spring! Well, it is in most of the world. I’m now into my 5th month of winter. Snow started in November and continued until, well it snowed yesterday.

There is over 4 feet of snow in my back yard, I still have to wear winter boots and I actually slipped under my car the other day. I’m so done. I’m beyond done. I’m over done.

I do get SAD, seasonal affective disorder, so I’m having a bit of a rough go right now. When I look at social media and see all the lovely spring weather pics from all over, I get excited! I start to think of how I’m going to arrange my patio furniture and what cute outfits to wear, then I look out.

That’s where my BBQ goes.

I’ve been feeling super down about all this snow. I’m not an outdoorsy person who skis or snowshoes so this extra winter just sucks!

So many people are going on their Easter holidays next week, or are gone now. All those pics of sunshine and beaches, pools and cocktails, sigh…I wish I was going too. I really have no right to complain as we spent three weeks in Florida in January, but that doesn’t change or fix how I feel right now.

Spring is coming though, just not as fast as I’d like right now. It is sunny today, so that’s a start.  I guess that’s what I have to deal with to live in a safe, clean, beautiful place.

And I’m off!

Sad Times.

I’ve been through some shitty things in my life, and now I have one more to add. I had a miscarriage.
I had been having some issues over the past week. I called my doctor and was sent for blood work and was booked for an ultra sound. That’s when I found out. They didn’t tell me when it actually happened, just that it did.
I was booked in that same afternoon for a D&C. It all happened so fast. Then it was over. I was waking up in the recovery room. Then I had to wait, just lie there and wait for almost 3 hours while medication dripped into my IV. Just staring at the ceiling listening to hospital sounds.
The nurse looking after me was so sweet. She was from Liverpool originally so of course I chatted to her about England. I’m convinced I’m meant to be British. But other that a couple quick chats with her it was trying to count the little squares on the fluorescent light on the ceiling.
Now what? Do we try again? Am I too old? Should I be happy with my darling Mr. Bubbers and be done with it. I’m an only child and I turned out alright, well kinda.

And I’m off! (Not really, I’m going to lie down)